March 12, 2005. It has been almost 2.5 years. I found "someone" else. But you will always be here. I don't have the heart to delete you just like LJ.
2 Thot(s)
Ur thots
Friday, August 10, 2007
Yesterday evening...
Me: I'm on leave tomorrow and I'm having breakfast with a friend before going to office for a while.
Mum: Huh? Why bother taking leave? Just stay in office.
Bro: You are overworked and underpaid.
Me: Sigh.
Today...
Former boss, JY & X: Why did you come back? Wasted and disrupted your leave.
Me: Its alright. I had my life earlier on. I will continue later after this. I'm not planning to stay long.
I stepped into office at 2.50pm and left at 6pm.
I popped by to see KL and she lamented how we are underpaid and she and few others had the discussion about it over lunch. I told her I'm being abused. KL laughed. She said, "I have never thought of that before." I told KL I surfed UNICEF website last night. Looking for opportunities there if they want to hire someone with my qualifications and/or experience.
I will always have this "angel" and "demon" talking to me. The angel will say "Stay on. This is something you enjoy doing and this is something you have regard as your career." And the devil will say "Don't be stupid. Your pay is pathetic. It does not equates to the amount of work you are doing." Sigh. So the question that will always haunt me "Is it all about the money?" Money - the root of all evils?
Over breakfast with Dino, (and I must say I could have not have enjoyed it any less) we came up with an idea to sue our mothers for hounding us to get married, embarrassed us by calling us when we out with friends to "remind" us go home and not allowing us to have a relationship with a boy when we were in school thus led us to be immune with the idea to be in a relationship and get married. Both of us were wondering if there any lawyers out there will take up our case. We are just seeking justice. As the fault is not entirely ours for how we behave and react currently. How can our mothers don't allow us to hang out late at night with friends when they themselves do the same e.g. they disappear without informing us where they are going and come home late sometimes without telling us where they are. We just want justice to be served. We reckon we will garner support from other single women out there who shared the same plight as us.
Dino and I will make a good couple but too bad she is a woman herself. She and Sophia are moving in together perhaps I should in with them too.
2 Thot(s)
Ur thots
Thursday, August 09, 2007
Statistics. Bad and Good. Choices.
"Your friend is pretty so she can choose but for you, you can't choose." I was speechless. I did not react. I just smiled.
On the way home it got me thinking, shouldn't those words hurt me? It did. Momentarily. My self-esteem hit the floor. But coming from someone I know it somehow did not register to my brain. I was slow I must admit. Why did I not retaliate? Is it because we know each other and perhaps I take it as joke or passing remark and I let it slide while my ego is bruised? When I left to go to the ladies one of them defended me and I was only told about it when I said something not too nice to the person who defended me. Why so? This question played on my mind all the way home. Is it because we are more forgiving when our loved ones i.e. friends and family treat us unkindly compared to strangers? Is it because its ok to say or act unkindly sometimes to our loved ones? MT once said we tend to be nice to those people we don't know than the people we know. Why? Because we take things and people we know for granted.
If I don't know him better, I would have, maybe gave him one tight slap and walk away. But do I want to stoop to his level? I just let it slide. If I count or keep tabs on the amount of hurtful words or actions people I know say or do to me and vice versa, each of us will be a lonely person.
Statistics. Bad and good. Choices.
